Lay low, and carry a big stick! March 13, 1997 (and more)
I know that all of you have been wondering where, and what Verl has been up to. Child. It appeareath that Verlene has the ability to overturn some A-List apple carts. I have become the ruination of their life. I could care less how many of your friends are flying in from where, to attend your party, direct from the Winter Party...yes, yes, yawn. Unless they are bringing in something to fit in the blender, they are all useless!
People! Do not put me on a committee unless you want to hear what I have to say. And do not schedule your trivial meetings for my P.C. (post cocktail) hours! I am not going to be agreeable, and you are going to regret messing with me! There is a certain Canadian gentleman who, to this day, repents pissing me off in Provincetown.
Anyhow, the clock struck 8:00 P.C., meeting time, and I made my grand entrance. A white, faux fur stole wrapped around an a stunning strapless gown of pink and white silk shantung. Hoping to add an extra measure of glamour, I was wearing my opera length gloves, a strand of faux pearls, and matching earrings.. A porcelain rose on my lapel, and a perfectly placed beauty mark. It was going to be a night to remember. Let me tell you that the fur and opera gloves were off in two shakes and I was down in the mud with all the other trailer wannabees. Verlene got her way. She always does! Sometimes.
It was then off to help dear Trudy move! (Well, I paid for the Pizza anyway) Bless her! She has been so sweet to all of us with the publishing of the TrailerPark News. She has been forced to give up the master suite in her split-level and move into the basement. Write to her at Trudy@datalounge.com, to let her know that you love her! I am taking over the kerosene space heater, the dehumidifier, dog food and capers. Or you can visit her at http://www.datalounge.com/trudy
Gosh, first Marianne was dethroned as the Queen of Carpetland and then Trudy has this happen! Girls you need anything, please let me know...I have lots of MacDonalds Coupons, and with the NEW reduced prices you may be able to eat like a Trailerqueen for quite a while!
Mi Trailer es Su Trailer!
OK, so what has been going on in the Park? Well, the big news is that Debbe Reynolds "packed her toothbrush, gassed up the Geo" and moved to San Diego. She reports that cute young things "pop" in and all is well. Apparently there are gnats on the West Coast too! Samantha, there has been a "Dan-sighting", beware! The rest of the playtex gals are fine. I suppose. They are all packing to move but insist that they will be here for Liza's big wedding. (Mark you calendars, and remember to book the limos well in advance)
I think that people at work have figured out that I live in a trailerpark! They came to me before the monthly "First Friday" party and asked me to sing the Mary Tyler Moore Theme. Let's not stereotype! Yes, I knew all the words.
Marcia Zoom Zoom is showing her piece at "Lump" (the new gallery downtown, where yours-Verly nearly got killed!) I have not been as yet! Well, the above mentioned party included alcohol and strippers. A lethal combination pour moi! I woke up the next morning, QVC blaring and hoping that I had not ordered anything. Funny I though that a "Pant set" was something that happened after I tried to play tennis without a full pack of cigs.
Marcia did treat me to an evening with the National Deaf Theatre. It was a pleasant, if not slightly surreal evening...handsome people talking without words, in a giant garden...usually I have to pay good money to have a trip like that! The following evening Sylvia got all of us (including Consuela and Edwina) to attend the "Balle de Bahia", a lovely, if not topless, Brazilian dance ensemble. I did get to sit next to the only Tom Bianchi model in town. Lucky moi!
Amanda! You do too know at least one gentleman. Leave the Latino man. I've slept with an angel! They have to leave early, and all those feathers and bright lights are quite a mess to sleep with.
Well, I've got to run.
No mas paella, por favor!